lucy...eye wittness news at 11. wtf? ha!

Jo3's H3r3

Don't Tell Anyone


Your lost in the shadows
Doesn't even feel like home
They tell you to stay
But you just want to run
It watches from behined
Scares the tears back inside
You could run forever
And still never hide
They argue and pled
And show you pictures you don't want to see
A slide show of pain
What's this horrid game?
Now it taunts, is this it'll ever be?
One day you could breath
And turn it all into reality
Push it back
Don't let it free
Dear, god
Get this demon away from me

a vaction, a beautiful escape. Lets just run tell our legs give out.

To much planning, waiting for something that could turn easily into nothing.
Am I fool? Have I hoped to much?
In the end we will see.
Distress, anger, bitterness, happiness, anxious, creativeness, lonlieness, broken, whole, alive, dead, scared, beautiful, happy, loved, hated, betrayed, magical, plain, brave, hurt, pain, and wonderfull.
Oct, how you've changed me.
You made me see the things I'm blind to.
Wake up Trisha, its going to be a roller coaster! First stop, "your heart" that you've left behind, pick it up and feel it again.
A beautiful thing is coming, are you ready for it?
Just make sure....you can see. Don't let this one pass you bye.




I'll die for you, if you live for me.

San Diego (meaning:a whales vagina) here i come.
Taking a trip up to Saint Diego this weekend,with C.A.D. Fun times, going to the "Youth Specialties confrence" And i know! "whats theY.S.C."your thinking. WELLL hold tight..im geting to that little bee's. It's a 3day long cofrence, with diffrent semanares, booths, classes, FREE STUFF (from this clothing company Jedidiah ..soo good!)
Its a christian confrence based around out reach programs, clubs, youth groups ex ex..they teach you things to do in your programs. Such as games, how to mentore and blah blah blah...(im going for the free stuff)
Well, that and the fact im on staff. WOOT FREE TRIP!!!! It will be a hoot of a time, in the Saint Diego convention center packed with thousands of people...eek DONT TOUCH ME, I DONT LIKED TO BE TOUCHED!
I get to be around Anna for four days<3, its going to be amazing.I miss her face, i cant wait to begin and let myself reach some sort of solitude.
Best part is...its only staff..no kiddies! Muah! The other best part is, that Anna and I are the youngest staff members....i guess im the yougest dear Anna is older then me.How cute. I'm never the youngest! Weird. Wait..thats not true, i take that back...god im such a lier. Forgive me.

So STOKED! 3amazing weekends in a row!

Campus After Dark: A Christan out-reach program for young life(high school kids)

I was with the kids on wed, and they went into groups..each group got a staff member. We were having a talk about..somthing nice somone did to you, where they didn't expect somthing in return..and vice versa. These kids hardly had a story to tell. They all had somthing decent enough they've done for another..however none of them couldnthink of somthing someone nice has done for them.
Made my heart sink into my stomach. How awfull must it be to not have a friend/friends that look out for you? I told them meny storys of mine, one being Ava and my car. They where shocked that i took it so calmly..and i had her best intrest at heart..with money and what not.
I couldn't hold it back, i just had nothing else to say, but "you guys need new frineds" They said "yeah, tell me about it." These kids are so lost in material objects..so lost in the pressures of high school..so lost in themselfs..being so self involved, and never giving 2thougths of someone else"unless its a crush"
Im very eager to get closer to them, and be an influence. Let them see mine and Anna's relationship, and the fact that were so selfless towerd eachother...and let them realize....ummm, what? I want that!
Friends..excuse me "My Family" Are my life, and seeing the youth being blinded bye somthing pretty is scary to me.
Has the world under us lost all compassion?
I guess its no surprise...our family is one of a kind, and nothing anyone does can compare to it.
Loving is in our blood.
MOney is in theres.
But if i have anything to do with it..one day that will change.



(forgive this horrid spelling, This computer erases letters if i try and fix it)

Giving my thoughts some time to adjust to the once again...trisha's un-employeed! (Well, I guess that's not all true...I still have dennys : /...kill me?)
I try and stop the anxiety from taking over, so far I'm doing just peachy at that.
Realized that now....maybe I can find somthing better? Yes! A cruise line, I can travel around the open sea...on a over sized boat. Maybe ill get a nice straw hat...and of course a nice bright red hawaiian shirt. (Haha fuck yea davey!!) (i have a strange feeling about acton......job in acton?)
Forgive my rant on being so negative, I'm so drained from all this negative energy that leaks out of me 24/7..its hard being this miserable. So I say no more!!!!!!!
I'm done! Over! Start a new?!
Trisha=stressted. Money...money...money...this whole world runs off green poaper. Wonderful!
Dear car insurance...I'm sorry..but, yeah..I'm not gonna pay you. Maybe next month?. A bike=for the poor persons soul..aka trisha.
I could rock a bike, yeah maybe a huffy (beach cruiser) : ).
Hmmm, move to santa cruz? Yes...its ever so lovley there. San fran raves/.I hear are amazing! Someone told me one time I should be a p.e. Teacher.....I got angry.

I'm pretty sure I want to move out of this valley.....geting a little (a lot) bored and annoyed with this area.
But where to go?...........(thinking ever so hard) oh goodness, who am I kidding? Ill be here forever.
Waittttt....noooo wayyyyy! Wow, sorry...was having a crazy person moment for a second..."never leave this place" now there's a thought.

I guess I have no choice but to become a sailor.



So I just had a thought! Its a good one. I was thinking about thoes get rich quick scams. Hahah, and how anthony got involved in it..and didn't even know it. Started selling chocolate! Hahaha, ended up with boxes of chocolate..and no one to buy it.

<3 lets break free from these chains.

an ode to trisha kay:

your magic eclipses the redundant mainstream we face day to day,
forgive me for sounding almost fanatical with these words i say:
there is no light compared to the one you cast.
a breath of fresh air to this weary and bored soldier
and it comes and goes, almost too fast.

do not let the demons overtake your majestic soul,
hold tight to the strength,
and inhale that everlasting faith
that i place in you.

and know when the darkest of shadows fall,
i will do my best 
to rid the worst,
when the devil makes his call.
-end- 




By-Lor N.

    I wote about our lovley Molly hunting......at first not knowing anybody, what so ever!.....real life trainspotting..nomad...ended up in san fran...met tons of people...have tons of contacts now....mer.........temple eating....beach cruising...driving complete strangers around....sleeping in our car....wanting to move there...maybe picking up a girl to go to massive...ditching this massive hair show ( that we were to model in) w/ one of "thee guys" in the industry....meeting mama......potion shopping...dorm sleeping....kelly visiting....free lucy.....bridge walking....vegan donut eating....things we consumed  for free..............costume shopping....bay bridge driving....burning man rave..........Driving sam&mer to san fran.....Avoiding Thomas calls.......drove this guy Titties down with us...........insert txt here:Hey its Tommy, im making the order right now..how meny did you want?...Thanks, but no thanks tommy, we've got it taken care of it..... Dear Shank, we no longer need your services....weve got it taken care of! 
 Hey rob...yeah, we found some...so dont bother! Thanks for helping all the same! ........dear alex, you've been a big help, however we cant wait tell monday..leaving sunday, thanks though!! Maybe next time....EEK! Hey Thomas, yeah i dont  know about that 11 for 200$? I think im gonna have to pass......Hello Ben unfortunately i would rather find someone who has it now, then  have to pick it up the day of Massive "yeah, but im going for sure...and i can have it." This could all be very true, however if worse come to worse ill give you a call. 

Adventures........
   


But! It got deleted! : ( lame.

 Broken:
1. unable to function
2. shattered into pieces
3. unauthorized entrance

Numb:

1.	incapable of action or of feeling emotion; enervated; prostrate: numb with grief.

2..	lacking or deficient in emotion or feeling; indifferent: She was numb to their pleas for mercy.

Exhausted:
1.To treat completely; cover thoroughly: exhaust a topic
2.To escape or pass out: Steam exhausts through this valve. 

Loss:
1.the state of being deprived of or of being without something that one has had.
2.failure to make good use of something, as time; waste. 
3.a thing or a number of related things that are lost or destroyed to some extent:

Surrender:
1.to give (oneself) up to some influence, course, emotion, 

2..	to give oneself up, as into the power of another; submit or yield.

Love:
1.a profoundly tender, passionate affection for another person. 
2.a person toward whom love is felt; beloved person; sweetheart.
3.strong predilection, enthusiasm, or liking for anything:


Angry:
1.feeling or showing anger or strong resentment 
2.expressing, caused by, or characterized by anger; wrathful:

Pain:
1.mental or emotional suffering or torment
2:to cause (someone) mental or emotional pain



Scared:
1to fill, esp. suddenly, with fear or terror; frighten
2.to become frightened




























Forgetting:
1. cease or fail to remember; be unable to recall
2.to omit or neglect unintentionally
3.to leave behind unintentionally;
4:To fail to mention